The first thing we must understand while knowing our self-worth is that there is none else but ourselves only in the whole world who can make us understand our own value. Secondly, the very process of understanding ourselves may be underwhelming, leading to feeling pain, personal agony, and temporary depression. The reason is very simple, our self-evaluation may often declutter our minds of the false notions we have been harboring about ourselves for ages. But in the long run, this is definitely going to reshape our life, adding new purposes and goals in front of us.
Who am I? Basically, this is the first question that comes on the top of our minds while we introspect ourselves and try to find out our actual worth. Am I actually living a life I deserve or am I living my own life or someone else’s life? Very often people live the lives of others and throughout their lives, they never ask themselves these two questions. The first time they ask themselves these questions is when they are about to depart from this world. It is too late by then. They ruminate on their deathbeds and leave the world with so many strings yet to be played in their hearts. It is thus so much important to know and understand the lives we are living.
Who am I? If you ask yourself this question, what will be your answer? 99% of the fellows will miss the moot point of this question. They will come up with answers like their name, their job, their salary, etc. What they mostly miss is that they do not understand their own specialty. When we honestly analyze this question, the real perspective should be how I am different from others and how I am unique or what I have done to make me different from others.
We have often been nurtured from our childhood in a way that we fail to have our own life goals. As we grow up, our parents, our society continuously remind us to be what they expect us to be. Any deviation from that is considered as our failure to succeed in life. This is the first thing preventing us to be real us. Any imposed dream hinders our personal growth. It is therefore the foremost precondition that we must harbor our goals in life. Unless we live the dreams of our own, we are not living lives of our own. This way, parents must inculcate their kids from their childhood how to nurture their own dreams and how to become an individual in every aspect. An individual without any individuality will never understand his self-worth and will therefore never live a unique life. Helping their kids to grow individuality, personality of their own is the foremost responsibility of the parents.
The second question while analyzing our self-worth is whether we are living our own lives or not or whether we are living the life we deserve. This is very much related to the previous paragraph. Once we start chasing the dreams of others, we stop being ourselves. Many people with strong potentials in life often end up being nobody because they are not following the paths they should follow. Rather they follow a trend or follow the paths shown to them. Ask yourself this question, do I actually love what I do? Am I giving my best in whatever I do? More than 90% of the people do not love their jobs or continuously make complaints about the works they do. Just imagine, if Leonel Messi’s father would have wanted him to be a surgeon, what would have happened to football? Or, what would have happened to his patients? It is therefore very much essential to understand what we actually love or where we find interests in life. Dreams cannot be compromised. And unless we pursue the dreams we believe in, we are never going to lead our own lives.
Very often, we make our self-assessment on the basis of the opinions others hold about ourselves. It is true that getting pats on our back often motivates us to move an extra mile in life, but that alone should not be the driving force of our life. We must be prepared to face criticisms without ever listening to any good things about us. All good things in life come with a cost. So is appreciation. So, do not expect others to appreciate you for the good things you have done. Rather, be ready to be criticized heavily if you deviate even an inch from the set parameters of normalcy in life. Everyone who is ordinary does not want to be out of their league. Be your biggest fan and if the world is silent, give yourself the necessary pats to trudge along.
What if you were not there in the world? Time to retrospect your life. Remember the movie “It’s A Wonderful Life”. Remember how the guardian angel saved George Bailey’s life, who was under the impression that his life was falling apart and he was about to yield to the pressure. It was then the realization came. How would have been the world or the lives of others had he not been there? And that magical realization made him understand his self-worth. Similarly, you can do that same exercise. Just imagine a world without you. Imagine that you have never existed. Now try to find out what differences you have made in the world. How have you changed the lives of the people surrounding you? You will find some astonishing results which will make you understand how important you are to yourself, to the people near you, and to this beautiful world.
Life is full of people who are waiting for the right opportunity to drag us behind or to flatter us to get their own jobs done. If we trust them to evaluate ourselves, we are perhaps making a big mistake. A mistake that may cost us the position where we should belong. You are what you believe yourself to be and not what others dictate you to be. You are what you dream of yourself. You are what you do to make your life more meaningful. Most of us never explore our inner strengths and weaknesses and spend our lives under false impressions about ourselves. If you are reading this article, this may be the right time to take out some time, initiate the process of rebuilding. Take the ‘Control’ button of your life, forget ‘Copy’ and ‘Paste’, delete whatever has hindered your personal growth, and enter a new life of your rejuvenated self. You are worthier than what you believe yourself to be.
Read the review of Lost In Space (Netflix) here
Read my review of Money Heist here
Read a very nice short story in Bengali by Dipayan Das here